Laura Ashley, the untethered barrage balloon that is my local madwoman, was wandering around outside the convenience store this morning. She's normally inside the shop rearranging the shelves and slipping things into your basket when you're not looking, like tampons or WD40. I've been wondering if the items are selected purely at random or whether she deliberates over what she feels you need in your life. Hmmm, what about me says tampons and WD40 I wonder?
Anyway, today the shop owner was late, probably hoping that she'd get bored and go back home rather than spending her entire day in his shop again (I've yet to go into the shop and find it less one madwoman). But there she was, hanging around, talking to the paving stones and the tree, in her floral dress and sequined pumps as always.
I offered her a cheery "Morning!" on the way past. Her reply...
"Oh, naaaaah! It's cold when the wind blows. Squark, squark. That's a crow".
I hurried along.
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