Right, before I go any further perhaps I should warn anyone of a more prude-ish disposition to follow this link instead of reading any further...
Right, with that out of the way I'm free to tell you about my night of bumming. The Boyf and I went for a beer on Sunday evening. We'd been visiting family all weekend - his up in the Midlands on Saturday, mine down in Kent on Sunday - so we were desperate for a beer and a dance. I have to say that where we went was chock full of sexy guys. It seemed like every man I I have a crush on was in there. All of which was giving me the horn. Of course, The Boyf always has the horn, so at about 2.30 in the morning (so much for the early night), we finally dragged some American guy back to our place for some bum fun. (I say "some American guy" cause I have no idea what his name is).
I've been moaning recently that I'm not being fucked enough, and I guess word had got round. Apparently as far as America. So I ended up spending the rest of the night either biting the pillow or closely studying my ankles. He was a big guy, and had plenty of weight to put behind his pounding. Yesterday at work I had to try to find lots of things to do where I didn't have to sit down. Which is just as well, cause if I did I'd probably have fallen asleep. Serves me right for moaning.
Which has all made me think about why we do these things. I mean, was it all worth having to put up with an annoying American? He was good at The Bumming, but I got precious little out of it other than an arse that felt like a ripped-out fireplace. Anyway, I didn't get the feeling that he knew how to do anything other than put his dick in a hole. Sorry, replace the word "put" with "slam". And for that I had to endure a 'don't do this, don't do that' attitude. It wasn't like I was trying to bake a cake or paint his nails, I was just trying out different positions and stuff. Blimey, Americans can be whiney.
Hmmm, is this the kind of thing I should be writing about? Shouldn't I up the intelligence level and be awfully witty?
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