In the office, 3.45pm this afternoon...
Boss: The DJ that was going to do my engagement party dropped dead at the weekend.
OMO: Christ!
Boss: Yeah, I feel so sorry for his wife. And I need to find a new DJ a bit quick. Don't know any do you? Mind you, I'd need one who doesn't just play "YMCA" and all that queer stuff.
OMO: *blink*
Boss: You know, I need someone to play normal music.
OMO: *blink, blink*
Boss: Which reminds me; I know I invited you and your boyfriend but could you make sure you don't kiss or anything cause there will be children and old people present.
OMO: I'm totally lost for words. Well done!
Showing posts with label Conversations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Conversations. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
An Office Conversation 2
Friday 30th March, 11:18am
Boss: S? Where are you going for your leaving drink at lunchtime?
S: Don't know yet.
Boss: Well can you make up your mind cause I'm going to meet a mate and then bring him to wherever you are.
OMO: Ooooh, are you bringing a date with you at dinner time?
Boss: No! I'm bringing a mate. Don't go saying that to him cause he'll beat you up.
OMO: Having trouble coming to terms with it too huh?
Boss (ignoring my last comment): And anyway, it's not "dinner time" it's "lunch time". Dinner time is at 9pm.
OMO: You're eating too late. No wonder you're putting on so much weight.
Boss: Tosser!
Boss: S? Where are you going for your leaving drink at lunchtime?
S: Don't know yet.
Boss: Well can you make up your mind cause I'm going to meet a mate and then bring him to wherever you are.
OMO: Ooooh, are you bringing a date with you at dinner time?
Boss: No! I'm bringing a mate. Don't go saying that to him cause he'll beat you up.
OMO: Having trouble coming to terms with it too huh?
Boss (ignoring my last comment): And anyway, it's not "dinner time" it's "lunch time". Dinner time is at 9pm.
OMO: You're eating too late. No wonder you're putting on so much weight.
Boss: Tosser!
Thursday, March 15, 2007
An Office Conversation
Thursday 15th March 2007, 11:16am.
OMO (to a colleague): Yesterday, whilst you were off, the Boss took me for a romantic walk down by the Tower of London.
Boss: I did nothing of the sort. We just went for a walk to discuss work away from the office.
Colleague (to OMO): Oooh, nice. Did you hold hands?
OMO: No, but he made me do unspeakable things. I felt cheap and used at the end of it.
Boss: No...
OMO (interrupting): But, unlike most old men who want sexual favours, he didn't even bother to buy me an icecream or a bag of sweets.
Boss: You wanker.
OMO (to a colleague): Yesterday, whilst you were off, the Boss took me for a romantic walk down by the Tower of London.
Boss: I did nothing of the sort. We just went for a walk to discuss work away from the office.
Colleague (to OMO): Oooh, nice. Did you hold hands?
OMO: No, but he made me do unspeakable things. I felt cheap and used at the end of it.
Boss: No...
OMO (interrupting): But, unlike most old men who want sexual favours, he didn't even bother to buy me an icecream or a bag of sweets.
Boss: You wanker.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Quotes From The Boss: No.1
I've been absolutely inundated with a single request for something more about my boss. So here's a little snippet of joy that fell from his lips a short while ago...
OMO: I can't work out why my tax code is slightly different to other peoples'. I seem to be getting a miniscule tax break.
Boss: Perhaps it's for the AIDS medication.
OMO (frowning): Er... I don't have AIDS.
Boss: Oh, I figured all your kind had AIDS.
Another deathly silence ensues in the office.
OMO: I can't work out why my tax code is slightly different to other peoples'. I seem to be getting a miniscule tax break.
Boss: Perhaps it's for the AIDS medication.
OMO (frowning): Er... I don't have AIDS.
Boss: Oh, I figured all your kind had AIDS.
Another deathly silence ensues in the office.
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